birth story

So, after three weeks things are beginning to return to normal. Arabelle is on somewhat of a feeding schedule...one of course she decides on and one of course we adhere to. Luckily, John is at home with us for awhile...until September actually when fall semester starts. His PI (primary investigator for those of us who don't do science) gave him the time off from when Arabelle was born until classes start...and I couldn't be happier about it...he is a huge help around the house...especially since the recovery for me has been slow...which leads me to the reason for this post....

If you are a family member, or were on the email list John sent updates to while we were in the hospital, then you already know this story. For those others who actually read this blog or are friends with us on facebook, and have maybe wondered why we didnt respond to your congratulatory messages, I wanted to share the birth story because it turned out to be much more dramatic than we ever planned for.

Going back to a week before Arabelle was born, I lost a lot (translate: gushing) of fluid on Tuesday, July 7th, at some point in the morning. We did the usual...packed everything, took showers, got Parker all set up with food and water, called the doctor, and went to the hospital. I was having regular contractions but no change that would lead to labor. They monitored me for about 3 hours, preformed some very unpleasant tests that I wish to never relive, ever in my life, in order to measure progress, and concluded that I was not in labor, and decided to send us home. Apparently my water broke and the place it came from sealed itself back again. Who knew this could happen? Not us that's for sure. We were worried about the amount of fluid around the baby at this point, but, after a few more tests, resident #3 in labor and delivery decided she was fine.

This day was hard because if you have ever been pregnant or known someone who is pregnant, you live with the understanding that when the water breaks, the baby is supposed to come shortly after. So as they were telling us to go home, I was thinking...."ummm....no...my water broke, it's time, let's get this show on the road....youre telling me there is no end in sight yet?"

So we left. Spent the next week in limbo. John stayed at home with me for most of the next week because I was an event waiting to happen. He watched me all week...which to say the least was a bit annoying and yet comforting. I had contractions for the next week...let me say again...I HAD CONTRACTIONS FOR A WEEK....but was not progressing in labor. We went to the doctor once more that week and he told us it was just a matter of time...so we waited...while I had contractions for a week...not little ones...did you figure that out yet?

Ok, so a week later, on the 15th, at about 5 in the afternoon...John had just gotten back from riding his bike (no, he's not 12) because I had texted him that I didnt feel good...I was achy and pretty miserable and he needed to be back at that point....he ran in panicked, realized that I was ok, just not happy, and then we discussed what to have for dinner...I didnt want to cook so John was on his way out the door to get something when the water broke for the 2nd time. It didnt stop this time so we knew this was the real deal. Same thing as before...packed, Parker, doctor, hospital.

Once we got to the hospital I was having regular contractions and feeling pretty uncomfortable. They admitted me this time and started the long process of trying to help my labor along because again, those contractions were not leading to anything. That night they gave me one drug that was supposed to help labor progress and by 6 the next morning gave me pitocin because the first attempt did not work.

By lunch time on the 16th, after 18 hours labor, I had yet to dilate or progress in labor. They were giving me the maximum amount of pitocin along with with some pain meds because I was very uncomfortable at this point. Doctor decided we would wait a little longer to see if the pain meds would help me relax and make progress. Around 3 or 4, I think because by the way our room didnt have windows so I felt like I was in a time warp, I reached 1 cm. Almost 24 hours after my water broke, there was little to show for the work my body was doing. At this point we opted for the epidural because the pain was getting unbearable (and, yes, I felt like a weenie because I was in so much pain and I hadnt even gotten to the hard part yet). After the epidural, and my interrogation of the anetesiologist's experience, I felt some relief but not for long. I was pushing the pain medicine button every 20 minutes while barely able to breathe because of the pain. And yet, after a few hours, around 6 that night, when the doctor checked again, still only at a 1.

At this point I was trying to figure out how I was going to mentally and physically make it through labor. John and I had done a lot of talking throughout the pregnancy about how we were going to handle labor. I was ok with having the epidural and I was certain I wanted to avoid having a c-section. We were even discussing these things the day before I went into labor. I was sure that with the epidural I would be able to handle labor and deliver her the old fashioned way. So when the doctor said, still at a 1, I almost lost it. I immediately asked him at what point do we consider the c-section. This question was a shock to John because we had discussed in detail how we wanted to avoid the surgery. I just couldn't imagine going on in labor. I needed it to end. I didn't think my body was going to be able to do it. I was exhausted and mentally drained. Doctor said it was definitely a possibility at this point, he wanted us to talk about it and he would be back.

Now, let me say a few things about our doctor. Dr. Park is his name and we couldn't have asked for a better care provider. Most of our prenatal visits were with him because we liked him so much and trusted his judgement. He held our hand through the whole pregnancy, which was nice because we had a lot of concerns and questions, being first time parents. One of our major concerns was that my anatomy would pose a problem at some point during the pregnancy. I was born with one kidney, one ovary, one fallopian tube, and only half of what is considered a normal uterus. Knowing this when we got pregnant we chose the Ob practice at UConn because they specialize in high risk pregnancies. We met Dr. Park at our 2nd or 3rd visit and stuck with him from that point on.

Thankfully Dr. Park was on call on the 16th so we felt at ease with how everything was going...until we realized that labor could last for days since I was still at a 1. After asking about the c-section, and hearing Dr. Park's opinion, we spent the next hour talking and praying about what we should do. John didnt want to make the decision for me and I didnt want to exclude him from the decision. It was hard for me to explain to John how I felt like I couldnt go on, but that I didnt want to make the wrong decision if we went for the c-section - too many other factors...infection, recovery time, breast feeding right away, etc. So we prayed about it and then stopped talking about it...we were going to wait until Dr. Park checked my progress again.

One hour later....no progress had been made and we decided for the c-section. This was about 7 pm on the 16th and they started prepping me for the operating room. I was suppossed to go back around 8...then around 9:30....then around 11...which we did. Apparently there were two emergency surgeries that had to happen before me so we were left waiting until the OR was free. Needless to say I was nervous. But, I was ready for it to be over too. Surgery started at 11, Arabelle was born at 11:10 pm on the 16th. But, I didnt leave the operating room for another hour and half....this is when the major complications started.

Because I have only a half uterus, the contractions I was having during the previous week and in the hours leading up to the surgery stretched the tissue so much that I was close to rupturing. The contractions were pushing her into my hip bones rather than towards the birth canal...as a result, she had a lot of bruising and my uterus was doing way too much work. After Arabelle was delivered, Dr. Park spent the next hour and half trying to get my uterus to contract back down...which is a normal process after birth, but my body was not cooperating. The tissue was so atonic that it would not shrink like it was supposed to and therefore was taking up much of my abdomen. Eventually I lost too much blood for the surgery to continue...over 2 liters...so Dr. Park stitched me up and then inserted a balloon in order to keep the muscle from hemorrhaging....the procedure was similar to what happens during an angioplasty. Once we left the operating room and went to recovery, we had only seen Arabelle for about 5 minutes.

The next 24 hours were interesting to say the least. I was pretty drugged and only vaguely recall the order of events and how things happened. Apparently there were two concerns the doctors had after my surgery...a) the amount of blood I lost...a transfusion was a possibility and b) my uterus hemorrhaging....a hysterectomy was a possibility. Both things were contingent on my body's ability to heal quickly so they kept us in the recovery room for 24 hours...normally after birth you stay in recovery for a few hours then go to your post partum room. During this time we saw Arabelle a handful of times.

Thankfully around noon the next day...only 12 hours after surgery, I was healing and in Dr. Park's words, had turned the corner. Later that afternoon, during one of our talks with the Dr. about what had happened and what the plan was, he said, "if you had continued in labor, you and the baby most likely would have been a statistic....I've never seen a uterus that stretched and thinned out without hemorrhaging." I will probably never forget that moment.

So, we spent the next four days in the hospital. Thankfully breast-feeding wasnt an issue and I didnt get an infection...from all perspectives, the c-section was the way to go. Once we got home, the next week was pretty hard on all of us....crying, eating, pooping, sort of sleeping, taking pain medication, etc. Things are looking up now though and we couldnt be happier with our little girl. She is sweet as can be and definitely has a personality...I think we are in for a great adventure with her.

Oh, by the way, couple of fun facts for you...Arabelle was born at 11:10 pm...I was born at 11:10 am...and she shares her birthday (July 16th) with my grandfather...which I hear he is very proud of!